You don't get it okay, it's not easy for me to explain. But I'm not trying to be lazy, it's just that I'm so tired and I have no motivation to succeed and I don't even know why this life is happening to me.
I grew up feeling this way. Still feel this way many days, but my depression cannot keep me down. I fight every. I wish for things to be easy, to be strong, and sometimes it's impossible. Sometimes I just can't.
I hope you remember every night we laughed for hours in bed and aimless adventures on days off. Every night when you turn on the fan, or have to kill a spider.I hope these little moment are when you think of me most.
She's learned to hold all her feelings inside until late at night, and cover her mouth with her hand so no one hears her. She's perfected her fake smile. And she's been taught - oh so painfully to build her walls up high, to keep everyone out.