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This is very true.

Haven’t had my coffee yet, don’t make me kill you. // People should not annoy me before I have my coffee. You'll just a sarcastic response that is intended to make you shut up and go away.

text me quotes quote phone lol funny quotes texts

I hate voicemails. I don't have a voicemail box for this reason. Either text me or I'll see that you called and call back when I get a chance.

And they will know they were conceived via raunchy sex one day.

Fifty Shades Of Funny: The Best Of The 50 Shades Of Grey (good thing I havent read it!

Now this is exactly how Future Progression feels like. Half dreaming and half awake.

Story of my life! Autopilot driving isn't safe -- oh well!

"Oh, delicious" hahaha

Funny pictures about Before and after coffee. Oh, and cool pics about Before and after coffee. Also, Before and after coffee.

Coffee haha

Funny Workplace Ecard: Do you see SPARK in my hand yet? So then why are you still talking?

Sounds familiar! Or how bout when you start a project/chore and does 90% of it and they offer to help and does the last 10% and then takes credit for all of it?

That is if he will take the trash out at all! My husband does a ton of other things, but trash isn't one of them! I have learned to pick my battles!

I understand the concept of Cooking & Cleaning quote - 36 of My Favorite Silly, Crazy or Funny Quotes of the Day

36 of My Favorite Silly, Crazy or Funny Quotes For the Day

Large selection of Funny Tin Signs and Sayings ready to hang for fun wall decor for ideas for home or business. Add to your room a few funny tin signs or classic saying with a retro look.

I cannot agree more. I don't have time for you to decide on how many squirts of vanilla hazelnut syrup you want in your tall skinny vanilla late with soy milk instead of 2% today because you're "trying to cut back the calories". Just move so I can get my venti black dark roast.

Coffee - by Dave Barry "It is inhumane, in my opinion, to force people who have a genuine medical need for coffee to wait in line behind people who apparently view it as some kind of recreational activity.

If only I can remember this at the appropriate time!

how do you start business, how start business, to start a small business - Hey, I found your nose. It was in my business .lmfao I would love to have a sign so all my neighbors can see it.

Google Image Result for http://x3e.xanga.com/916f963a70430278901335/m222171514.jpg

She'd be "the Mom! and not only smarter than Dad . smarter than any of Dad's friends too!


Tickled You know that tingly little feeling you get when you like someone? That's common sense leaving your body. - Falling in Love

And this is how I feel EVERY morning! Bring on that delicious coffee - and keep it coming!

When barista asks me how I am doing at 0530 in the morning, I check my pulse in my neck. "I have a pulse, but no neural activity. Bean me please.